Instead of wallowing in self pity over the fact that I am a dateless old maid, I have made a recent change in my life.
I've been feeling pretty down on myself lately and I wanted/needed a change. I was tired of feeling like I wasn't good enough and I really needed to do something about it. (you see, I have a problem of over analyzing what people say, and criticizing myself way to much.) I decided to try and go running at least four times a week. It started off me walking to the temple and past the high school to my house. After a few days it turned into me jogging one strip, walking the next, jogging another strip, and walking the last part. This was great and I kept at it for about three weeks. Then I went on vaca to Houston for two weeks. Didn't exercise once. So when I came home I felt this weird anxiety (something I used to suffer from badly!) to start running again. Everyday I would think about running but then talk myself out of it. But about two weeks ago someone spoke at my ward prayer about setting goals and accomplishing them. It really inspired me, so I went home and made a list.
-read scriptures every day
-pray night n day
- run at least 4 days a week
- eat healthy
- organize room every sunday
- pay tithing
- etc etc
(these are all things I've been lacking in for a while now)
I also read this book called Skinny B****. I'll be honest I don't want to recommend it to anyone who is really offended by language and rude humor. This book is filled with it. I honestly found it quite humorous and it was the kick I needed to start. (I probably need to do more research about the stuff I read but it motivated me so much!) Ever since then I've been going running, lifting weights, eating extremely healthy, dancing (in my room with the lights off... try it, its fun!) swimming, and just trying to be really active. Not only have I seen a difference in my figure, but I can tell a difference in my attitude. The few weeks before I started this I felt so "depressed". I take this word lightly right now because I wasn't wanting to jump off a bridge and kill myself, but I was feeling so down on myself and blah you get the picture. But now I'm starting to feel great! I've been soaking up the sun, and getting my spirits back up! What I'm trying to say is that I'm not going to let the lack of dating affect my happiness. Cause you know what? You make your own happiness. I'm sure there are plenty of married people who have the "love" of their life but are still unhappy. Happiness comes from within, and from God. Doing the right things in life is going to make you happy. Being busy, but still finding time for fun will make you happy. Not taking things to seriously will make you happy. Interacting with people will make you happy. Going to church will make you happy. There are so many things that can make you happy in life! The opposite sex can make you happy for moments in time, but its your attitude that is going to make you the happiest. I've always known this, but I've just been realizing it more and more lately. Feeling good about myself and doing things that will keep me going and not being lazy will make me happy. When the timing is right and I meet the right person then thats great! I'll accept it fully! But I'm not going to be hoping for things to come into my life, when I'm not even ready for it anyways! I don't know if this made sense at all but I hope some of you understand. (don't get me wrong I still cry and I still get sad. But I think its good to shed a few tears once in a while :)
This blog post turned out way different than I was planning.
Oh, and for me, dressing "up" makes me feel happy. So finding cute outfits to wear every morning is so fun for me! It makes me feel good about myself. I will do a blog on femininity one day. (because I used to be scared of my feminine side. I dressed like a skater boy, because I thought I didn't want to be to girly! look at me now... hah!)
Now for my outfit of the day, I have a little surprise! I found this pattern today online and decided to try and whip out my own version of it! I didn't follow word for word I just kinda looked at the pictures and guess my way through. Hence why its not perfect. It needs a few tune ups to be really good but I'm pretty happy with the finished product.
Thank you for reading!
With Love,
Arielle.
